


mmmMMmmuaahhhaaa……. the french …. schampagne has alwasy been slelebrate for its ssexcellence,

by steelgayrun



Category: TF2 - Fandom
Genre: Crack, M/M, OOC, Other, Unsanitary, pee cameo, sick fetish, snot fetish, unethical doctor
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-10-26
Updated: 2018-10-26
Packaged: 2019-08-07 19:34:54
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, Rape/Non-Con
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,101
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16414589
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/steelgayrun/pseuds/steelgayrun
Summary: i am eating pipza





	mmmMMmmuaahhhaaa……. the french …. schampagne has alwasy been slelebrate for its ssexcellence,

By the look on his face, Scout could not say no fast enough.  
“Dear god, no.”  
“Oh, come on, Scouty pants. You are being fucking stoopid. Look at you. Look at me. This is how my face always is, verstanden? Gott! I, I’m a doctor. Nobody else is as qualified in bedside manner. Hm?” The doctor hoped he had provided enough immutable evidence for some quality conviction.  
“Ok, listen, my dad, not my business, I’m not going to bring him to you on a silver platter. And I ain’t bothering with protecting his snotty ass from you either, so, whatever. Later, you big sausage wurst.”  
Medic tossed his hands in frustration and made to find Spy himself. 

Unsurprisingly, the man was in his bedroom, still. Medic shoved a key in the handle and burst in.  
“Hello, Spy,”  
“Oh, GOD, nononon, leave me be. I am too tired for your antics!” And Medic was by his bedside on a mysteriously procured stool. Perhaps he snuck it in earlier.  
“Well, clearly, there is an issue here, and I am electing to ignore it. Come, look at all this junk I have. I’ll try them all and one of them will make you better. You must allow me to try some experimental medicine, yes?”  
Bedbound, and beyond sick of this man’s antics, the spy was well inclined to agree. “Oh docteur, I think I would do well with some earplugs, please, I would caress your beautiful face in seduction but I cannot move my arms. Mon cher.”  
“Oh, such a sweet talker you are. However, no! Or, well, maybe. Sign this waiver...”  
“For fucks sake!”  
“Yes, yes, ok, I shall have you sneeze on it. Here.”  
With snot conveniently procured from the spy, “This is certainly your genetic imprint and will do just fine,” the slightly ink stained tissue was put aside.  
“Please, wipe my snout, Dr.”  
The doctor elected to ignore his desires.  
“I cannot help but notice how frenzied you look.”  
“I’m fine, immerhim dank.”  
If the spy was not usually in mortal danger, he certainly was in the hands of his own team medic.  
Spy sniffled stronger than (sleep medicine chloride thing). He was basically snorting his own snot. Extremely sexy, if he did so say himself. Medic was hindering much more than he was helping.  
The bedside stool was pushed away as Medic intruded on his bedspace. He enjoyed the little space his legs had, and he was enjoying it less now.  
“I’m going to put this on you.” Please let it be gelified wine. This sucks.  
The Medic held up a pen-like steel rod. It was burning.  
“Be naked!”  
“Oh, please, is it too much to ask for you to tend to that personally.”  
“Scheisse,” complained Medic. He snuffed the flame and put it aside for the moment. He peeled the gentleman’s suitish pajamas away from his wet skin. How sickly and warm he was beneath. Delectable.  
“Will you raise yourself so I can remove your clothes fully?”  
“Non. It’s too uncomfortable; leave me be.”  
“Good.”  
Upon finding his pants, Spy commented “How perverse,”. Medic shrugged with a mock poker face. He was having a very good time. There was so much sweat between the man’s legs. Poor, poor spy. He would help him feel better. Maybe.  
“Why take my trousers off the full extent?”  
“Well, its easy, take my word for it.”  
“Fucking mystical man.”  
“Ja!”  
Spy breathed deeply through his nose. “Mm, very good. Your breathing has been shallow for a while. How healthy of you.”  
This man had no medical licence and he damn well knew it.  
“Anyvay! Lets get to work!”  
He flicked the lighter a few times, “Burnt fucking potato,” to which Spy choked on his phlegm.  
“I shall put this on your flesh if you like!”  
“I will pass.”  
The stick was lit.  
“How I want to do mean things to your little body, but a start is a start, isn’t it?”  
The doctor grinned with friend, “I have many of these medicinal tools. This one looks quite like a suppository type, doesn’t it? Oh, I had a fantastic idea.”  
Finally, the Spy’s poor groin was freed of the Doctors supressing warmth and pressure. His magnificent weiner stood weakly in this time of softness.  
“If I protest, you will just situate yourself on my waist again, won’t you.”  
“Again, good idea,” he murmured. Spy retained barely enough musculature to roll his eyes. He couldn’t see the man examining his anus nfkssdnfsdFKNSDFKSNDF  
“I imagine it would be nice to fuck you, if your arsch was nice and warm from this tool.”  
“Poetic musings.”  
Medic began to run the tool over Spy’s nipples. He groaned in irritation and wiped snot from his face. “Doctor...”  
The towering man leaned to him and whispered,  
“You don’t mind if I touch myself, ja?”  
Spy moaned weakly. Realising it wasnt a response, he whispered, “Fine,”  
And Medic took his hand and sucked the snot from his fingers while he started stroking his own cock. He left a kiss on his wrist and bent down to kiss Spy, who interjected, “You didn’t ask if you could do that,”  
Medic growled, “You are trying my patience,”  
5 litre bottle of LUBRICANT into this fanfiction.  
“Sign this new waiver, I am sick of you saying things to me which mean I cannot suck your lips. And also do whatever I want.”  
“Goblin deez nuts,” Whispered Spy Frenchly. He then reverse snorted projectile snot onto Medics dick, which he proceded to use to write “SPY” on a very large piece of paper as if he was finger painting.

 

{Rats, we’re the rats, we’re the rats…}  
“Oh, it’s the giant rat who makes all of the rules. What do you want, fool.”  
“Fuck”

Anyvay he is meant to get a boner, about like, puking and such, and put his little weiner on the clammy skin of spys torso, while spy is all like mon dieu you are so annoying, but in a sick way.  
He is very passionate about how hot sick people are, and if anybody complains, he just tells them they are lucky he is paying attention.

Medic rolled the steel around on the Spy’s burningly hot torso. By this point, he had mounted the man, and his erection was very visible. Spy hated to admit, the treatment felt good, although it was beyond a shite excuse for treatment. He found himself relaxing a little bit, despite his body occasionally convulsing with coughs or sneezes, and the very roused man on his lap. Who grabs his dick and pees in his nose.


End file.
